2008 Stella Awards! ~ Judges take note! - GreenPassion.org - Dedicated to Medicinal Cannabis Cultivation and Education

jangel · #1 (**permalink**) 04-26-2009, 05:46 PM

It's time again for the annual 'Stella Awards'! For those unfamiliar with these awards, they are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled hot coffee on herself and successfully sued the McDonald's in New Mexico where she purchased the coffee. You remember, she took the lid off the coffee and put it between her knees while she was driving.

Here are the Stellas for the past year:

7TH PLACE :

Kathleen Robertson of Austin , Texas was awarded $80,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The store owners were understandably surprised by the verdict, considering the running toddler was her own son.

6TH PLACE :

Carl Truman, 19, of Los Angeles , California won $74,000 plus medical expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord.. Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps.

Go ahead ... grab your head scratcher.

5TH PLACE :

Terrence Dickson, of Bristol , Pennsylvania , who was leaving a house he had just burglarized by way of the garage. Unfortunately for Dickson, the automatic garage door opener malfunctioned and he could not get the garage door to open. Worse, he couldn't re-enter the house because the door connecting the garage to the house locked when Dickson pulled it shut. Forced to sit for eight, count 'em, EIGHT, days on a case of Pepsi and a large bag of dry dog food, he sued the homeowner's insurance company claiming undue mental anguish.

Amazingly, the jury said the insurance company must pay Dickson $500,000 for his anguish. We should all have this kind of anguish.

Keep scratching. There are more...

4TH PLACE :

Jerry Williams, of Little Rock , Arkansas , garnered
4th Place in the Stellas when he was awarded $14,500 plus medical expenses after being bitten on the butt by his next door neighbor's beagle - even though the beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. Williams did not get as much as he asked for because the jury believed the beagle might have been provoked at the time of the butt bite because Williams had climbed over the fence into the yard and repeatedly shot the dog with a pellet gun.

Scratch, scratch ...

3RD PLACE :

Amber Carson of Lancaster , Pennsylvania because a jury ordered a Philadelphia restaurant to pay her $113,500 after she slipped on a spilled soft drink and broke her tailbone The reason the soft drink was on the floor: Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend30 seconds earlier during an argument.

Scratch, scratch, scratch. Hang in there; there are only two more Stellas to go...

2ND PLACE :

Kara Walton, of Claymont , Delaware sued the owner of a night club in a nearby city because she fell from the bathroom window to the floor, knocking out her two front teeth. Even though Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through the ladies room window to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge, the jury said the night club had to pay her $12,000....oh, yeah, plus dental expenses.

1ST PLACE : (May I have a fanfare played on 50 kazoos please)

This year's runaway First Place Stella Award winner was Mrs.. Merv Grazinski, of Oklahoma City , Oklahoma , who purchased a new 32-foot Winnebago motor home. On her first trip home, from an OU football game, having driven on to the freeway, she set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the driver's seat to go to the back of the Winnebago to make herself a sandwich. Not surprisingly, the motor home left the freeway, crashed and overturned. Also not surprisingly, Mrs. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not putting in the owner's manual that she couldn't actually leave the driver's seat while the cruise control was set. The Oklahoma jury awarded her, are you sitting down, $1,750,000 PLUS a new motor home.. Winnebago actually changed their manuals as a result of this suit, just in case Mrs. Grazinski has any relatives who might also buy a motor home.

Are we (society) getting more stupid...? Ya think??!!

More than a few of our judge's elevators don't go to the top floor either!

:span ked:

blackpantherparty · #2 (**permalink**) 04-26-2009, 05:53 PM

HOLY! That first place one was ridiculous. How thick do you have to be to think the cruise control is going to drive for you...

What are the choices for this year?

jangel · #3 (**permalink**) 04-26-2009, 06:00 PM

I don't think the year is out yet, so the idiots haven't cast their ballots yet! LOL!

Deb-HAS-grn · #4 (**permalink**) 04-26-2009, 07:24 PM

Their crazy and funny, but at the same time it's people like them, who would sue over the craziest things, thats why insurances are so high, to high for the small businesses

Mr.Moonbiscuit · #5 (**permalink**) 04-27-2009, 11:53 AM

i remember a few years ago an older couple sued a motor home company because they labeled the cruise control as auto pilot so the old guy got up and left the seat, same scenario.

jangel · #6 (**permalink**) 04-27-2009, 01:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr.Moonbiscuit

i remember a few years ago an older couple sued a motor home company because they labeled the cruise control as auto pilot so the old guy got up and left the seat, same scenario.

Makes you wonder how on earth he ever got old aiy?

green_nobody · #7 (**permalink**) 04-27-2009, 03:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr.Moonbiscuit

i remember a few years ago an older couple sued a motor home company because they labeled the cruise control as auto pilot so the old guy got up and left the seat, same scenario.

Once there was Darwinism that took care such, now there are courts and lawyers

like come on, either the salesman should be banned from ever entering politics or we need no drivers license anymore but logic tests!

ileso · #8 (**permalink**) 04-28-2009, 04:13 AM

!!!!!
i absolutely love the american legal system...

what very strong psychadelic drugs were the juries on?