| |||||||
| Register | FAQ | Calendar | Gallery | Arcade | Mark Forums Read | Chat Room |
| The over 40 Group Put On Your Jerry Garcia T-Shirt, Grab the Geritol, & Come On In! |
![]() |
| | LinkBack | Thread Tools | Display Modes |
| | #1 (permalink) | ||||||||
| Moderator Moderator
| The Original Hollywood Squares... If you remember the Original Hollywood Squares and its comics? These questions and answers are from the days when 'Hollywood Squares' game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions. Q. Do female frogs croak? A. Paul Lynde : If you hold their little heads under water long enough. Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be? A. Charley Weaver (aka Clifford Arquette) : Three days of steady drinking should do it. Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years. A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes. Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman? A. Don Knotts : That's what's been keeping me awake. Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's married? A. Rose Marie : No; wait until morning. Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older? A. Charley Weaver : My sense of decency. Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say 'I Love You'? A. Vincent Price : No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty. Q. What are 'Do It,' 'I Can Help,' and 'I Can't Get Enough'? A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment. Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking? A. Rose Marie : You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget. Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather? A. Paul Lynde : Because chiffon wrinkles too easily. Q. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year? A. Charley Weaver : Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries. Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score? A. Rose Marie : Ralph, the pin boy. Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other? A. Paul Lynde : Tape measures. Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet? A. Rose Marie : Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom. Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls? A. Marty Allen : Only after lights out. Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do? A. Paul Lynde : Make him bark? Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to? A. Paul Lynde : Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark. Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people? A. Charley Weaver : It got me out of the army. Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it? A. Paul Lynde : Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn't neglected. Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do? A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth. Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant? A. Paul Lynde : Who told you about my elephant? Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex? A. Charley Weaver : I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him. Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they? A. Charley Weaver : His feet. Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed? A. Paul Lynde : Point and laugh. And if you did not laugh at any of these, there has got to be something wrong with ya! Peace
__________________ Life, j-angel My Little Grow LST'ing w/Hardware My Outdoor Odyssey 2008 BONSAI MUMS Cloning a Flowering Plant My Little Grow Blueberry | ||||||||
| | |
| Sponsored Advertisements |
| | #2 (permalink) | ||||||||
| Medicine man BudMaster ![]() Location: Margaritaville
Gallery:
0
Thanks: 185
Thanked 101 Times in 82 Posts
![]() ![]() ![]()
| Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to? A. Paul Lynde : Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark. ,,, ![]() ![]() ![]() Great stuff Jangel...LoLSock | ||||||||
| | |
| The Following User Says Thank You to Sock For This Useful Post: | jangel (07-30-2008) |
| | #3 (permalink) | |||||||||
| Tokin & smokin Seedling ![]() Location: Des Moines, Iowa
Gallery:
0
Thanks: 58
Thanked 17 Times in 11 Posts
![]() ![]()
| Quote:
didn't arrive. This month is our state fair and the police are out in full force . But as they say, "This too shall pass." Peace, Love and Freedom to all ![]()
__________________ | |||||||||
| | |
| The Following User Says Thank You to eltone For This Useful Post: | jangel (08-02-2008) |
| | #4 (permalink) | ||||||||
| Moderator Moderator
| Glad I could help some way, Eltone. Peace, babes, and hope it gets better..
__________________ Life, j-angel My Little Grow LST'ing w/Hardware My Outdoor Odyssey 2008 BONSAI MUMS Cloning a Flowering Plant My Little Grow Blueberry | ||||||||
| | |
| The Following User Says Thank You to jangel For This Useful Post: | eltone (08-03-2008) |
| | #5 (permalink) | ||||||||
| Tokin & smokin Seedling
Gallery:
0
Thanks: 5
Thanked 30 Times in 22 Posts
![]() ![]() ![]()
| I recall seeing Oscar Levant being asked what he does for exercise: "I stumble a little bit and fall into a coma."
__________________ I'm just like him, the same as you. | ||||||||
| | |
| The Following User Says Thank You to barrelhse For This Useful Post: | eltone (08-05-2008) |
| | #6 (permalink) | ||||||||
| Newbie Seedling
Location: Great White North
Gallery:
0
Thanks: 8
Thanked 11 Times in 10 Posts
![]() ![]()
| Louis Armstrong on the "Tonight Show" Johnny-" Louis, do you think marijauna is addctive?" Louis-"No, Johnny. Ive been smokin' it every day for fifty years, and I ain't addicted!" | ||||||||
| | |
| The Following User Says Thank You to Jimmyspaz For This Useful Post: | jangel (08-06-2008) |
| | #7 (permalink) | ||||||||
| Tokin & smokin Seedling ![]() Location: Des Moines, Iowa
Gallery:
0
Thanks: 58
Thanked 17 Times in 11 Posts
![]() ![]()
| Good one, and so true. As, in the 30's and 40's the drugs of choice were alcohol and nicotine. However politicans remain the same as Oscar so eloquently puts it, " A Politician is a man that will double cross that bridge when he comes to it." Google "Oscar Levant" for his quotes. Notice how it was normal to refer to a politician as "He." Even though, after 100 years of political brainstorming, congress was forced to give women the right to vote, I say forced because it was an all male/white crowd, and they didn't want to give that up. This is the same type of prejudice we suffer from today with the unwarranted propaganda against Cannabis. I was informed that the word "Marijuana" is slang for Cannabis. Therefore cannabis is politically correct ![]() . Anyway thanks again, they are even funnier after I got my med yesterday. ![]()
__________________ | ||||||||
| | |
![]() |
| Bookmarks |
| Thread Tools | |
| Display Modes | |
| |
Similar Threads | ||||
| Thread | Thread Starter | Forum | Replies | Last Post |
| Original Homeland Security And Immigration | Mogie | Smokers n' Tokers | 0 | 01-25-2008 01:03 AM |